Breaking the news to your children that you and your ex-partner are getting divorced can be really difficult, especially when it’s something they weren’t expecting. There’s no right or wrong way to have the conversation and it’s not easy to know exactly what to say – especially when there’s a lot of animosity between the two of you.
There are, however, some ways you can make the conversation easier for both you and your teenage children.
Expect that they may be angry and upset
Being a teenager can be tough. They are growing up and trying to find their place in the world. Learning that their parents are getting divorced can leave your teenage child feeling angry and confused about how this is going to affect their life. They may look to side with one parent and place blame on one or both of you for the decision.
It’s important to understand that, while this is a life-changing decision for you, it’s just as big for them too. Their feelings are valid and the best thing you can do is listen to what they have to say and respond with reassurance.
Have the conversation together if possible
While you may not want to spend any time with your ex-partner, having the conversation with your children together can help them to understand what’s happening. You can answer their questions and also show them that although your family dynamic is changing, you still love them and that’s not going to change.
When you make the decision to get divorced, it’s often the result of much consideration. It’s an emotionally difficult process and you need support to help the legal aspects go as smoothly as possible.